'According To Him + Her': What's Considered Tricking?

Life & Love | Bené Viera | 09/17/2014 | 09:30 AM EDT

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Tricking didn’t start with rap’s declaration that “it ain’t tricking if you got it.” Men tricking on women was around even before your grandaddy’s grandad tried to buy his way into his woman’s heart.


So what’s considered tricking? And is it really tricking if you can afford it?


Tricking is when a man spends ridiculous amounts of money on a woman that isn’t his girlfriend. He buys her lavish gifts, takes her on trips, pays a few bills. It's the next level of wining and dining. By doing all of this he’s hoping to win her affection, to woo her. It’s something like courting only his end goal is probably not a relationship.


When a man tricks on a woman, generally speaking, he’s going to expect something in return. What that “something” is depends on the man — time, sex or control. Mostly sex. No one’s surprising you with powder blue Tiffany’s boxes to cuddle on the couch for a “House of Cards” marathon.


Interesting enough it’s always the folks without the means to spend who are so against tricking or call out their fellow men for lavishly spending on a woman. The men with money don’t care and don’t consider it as tricking because they have it to spend. And if he’s not complaining, why does anyone else care?


Ladies have to be careful with the “it ain’t tricking if you got it” men though. These guys have been doing this for a while. Or maybe you’re that special snowflake and this is a first for him. But trust he’s not tricking because you’re so pretty or you cook so well or you’re so smart and he just wants to spend all his money on you.


He wants something in return. Depending on how much he’s spent the price tag for what he wants may be mighty high. Are you willing to pay it?


Proceed with caution if you’re being tricked on. And if you’re the one tricking, hey, do you playa.


(Photo: Frederick Bass/Getty Images)

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