'According To Him + Her': If Your Spouse Cheats Once, Will They Always Cheat Again?

Life & Love | Gerren Keith Gaynor | 09/16/2014 | 10:00 AM EDT

Tune in to 'According To Him + Her' every Friday at 10 p.m. EST only on Centric!

We’ve all heard it before: once a cheater always a cheater. That old adage has been used like a broken record, so much so that many actually swear by it. But while it’s clear that cheaters tend to do so more than once, does it really mean that every cheater is a repeat offender?


Centric’s dating comedy series “According To Him + Her” will take on the ever-so asked question, “If he/she cheats once will he/she cheat again”?


The quick answer is: you never know. In love and life nothing is guaranteed--especially one’s fidelity. However, this doesn’t mean we should go around accusing everyone of being a serial cheater. In the dating world nothing is absolute, so you want to make sure that you’re basing your opinion on sound judgement and not biased assumption.


Being cheated on sucks, so it’s perfectly within your right to second guess your partner and even lose trust in their ability to be faithful. Still, by choosing to stay in the relationship you’re giving off the message that you (1) still want to be with them and (2) you're willing to forgive.


The only way to move past a cheating mate is to learn the art of trust. While it’s easier said than done, it’s the only sure way for the relationship to survive. Sit your partner down and ensure that you communicate how the infidelity has affected you. Get the anger and hurt out of your system and move on. You won’t necessarily forget but you must forgive.


Sitting him or her down also allows your mate to explain themselves; maybe they cheated because they were feeling neglected or because they’re not sexually satisfied. Whatever the reason, it will give you clarity and maybe even some peace of mind. Following these steps will ensure that you’ve done your due diligence in repairing the brokenness in your relationship--and if they do wrong again they have no excuse.


You can never know for sure if someone will be faithful to you whether they’ve cheated on you before or not, but it would be naive to think that just because he or she says “sorry” that they’re somehow immune to cheating on you again. But hey, as it goes in this thing we call love: you must date at your own risk.


(Photo: Kevin RL Hanson/DK Stock/Corbis)

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