'According To Him + Her': Should Your Mate Be Allowed To Vacation With Friends?

Life & Love | Bené Viera | 09/10/2014 | 01:12 PM EDT

Tune in to 'According To Him + Her' on Fridays at 10 p.m. EST

You’ll be surprised how many people have anxiety over their significant other going on vacation with his or her friends.

Is he going to get so drunk he forgets about his relationship and cheats? Will her girls convince her to let a random dude take body shots off her pierced belly? Is vacation going to result in one big orgy of inappropriate, crossing the line fun?

Of course these fears come from a lack of trust. Trust means no matter where in the world your partner is or who they’re with you trust them not to disrespect the relationship in any way. Yes, that means even on a girls/guys vacation.

Friday Centric's “According To Him + Her” will address Rule 420: "Your mate is allowed to vacation with his or her friends."

Be prepared to see the case made for those for friend vacays and those against.

Some may even be reading this thinking, ‘Why does he/she need to go on vacation when in a relationship? That’s what I’m here for.’ Ummm. Hello. Because they are still an individual. With a life and friendships that existed long before they knew you existed.

The myth that all vacations of a group of friends looks like The Hangover or Think Like A Man Too is widely exaggerated. A lot of times it’s relaxation, experiencing a new culture, sightseeing and talking about the opposite sex. Sure some alcohol and clubbing will likely be added to the mix, but is that really all that alarming?

If your mate cheating while on vacation is cause for concern it’s a silly one. A cheating partner will cheat at home. Two neighborhoods over from where you live if they’re that bold. It doesn’t take some magical “freedom” from a vacation to do dirt if that’s what they’re interested in.

Do you really want to be with someone you can’t trust to go on a vacation with friends?

Lastly, depending on how long you’ve been with your partner you should know these friends well enough to know what type of people they are. In more cases than not, if you’ve chosen a partner of substance, they have good friends— the kind that will swiftly remind them of what they have back home.

So relax. Same-sex vacay isn’t synonymous with ‘she’s going to find her very own Winston (think How Stella Got Her Groove Back).’ Let grown people be grown and stop worrying about what you have no power to change any way.

(Photo: Zero Creatives/cultura/Corbis)

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