According To Him + Her: Is It Ok For A Man To Put Off Marriage Until He's Financially Stable?

Life & Love | Bené Viera | 09/04/2014 | 12:33 PM EDT

Think smart: Finances are the No. 2 reason for divorce in the U.S.

Question: Is it okay for a man to put off marriage until he's financially stable? Answer: Absolutely. Not only is it okay for a man to put a marriage on hold until he's financially stable, a woman should as well.

According to a study conducted by the National Fatherhood Institute, the No. 2 reason for divorce in the U.S. is finances.

“Money talks and can make your life better or in some cases worse than you were. If money becomes a consistent topic of disagreement, the road to divorce is certain,” writes divorce attorney Mary Stearns-Montgomery.

Men are conditioned to be providers. When his finances aren't in order, it's hard for him to focus on a relationship or a woman's needs. Generally speaking, his mind is trying to figure out how to improve his bank account.

Marriage is a major commitment that no one should enter lightly. Your spouse’s finances become yours. His debt becomes hers. Her student loans become his. Both parties should not only be financially stable, but should also have the same financial goals.

Although the emphasis is on if it’s okay for a man to put off marriage for financial reasons, it’s a good idea for a woman to do so as well.

Women are equal contributors to their partnerships. If he’s coming into the relationship financially stable, she should as well. It’s about being on the same page. And in case of the unthinkable — divorce— she should have her own money to take care of herself.

When the No. 2 reason for divorce is finances, it's best to keep your chances of failure low by having financial stability. Whatever that means for you, make sure it's in order before marrying.

What are your thoughts on the matter? Let us know in the comments section below.

(Photo: Rob Lewine/Getty Images)

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