According to Him + Her: Is It Ever OK to Answer Your Partner’s Cell Phone?

Life & Love | Gerren Keith Gaynor | 07/08/2014 | 03:00 PM EDT

Does a committed relationship entitle you to your boo's call log?

Generally there are two types of relationships: those with boundaries and those without. The latter version emcompasses major red flags for anyone who wants a healthy, trusting and loving relationship.


Case in point: your man or woman’s cell phone rings, and you see that it’s an unsaved number. Do you (a) answer the phone or do you (b) give the phone to your partner to answer (assuming he or she is in close proximity.


While some people would venture to answer the phone - whether it be harmless or out of distrust of your mate - any true relationship expert would tell you that’s a big no no.


Checking your significant other’s text messages or answering his or her phone is not only out of bounds, but it’s also a sure sign that you don’t respect your partner’s privacy, personal space, and may even point to the fact that you simply do not trust your partner. And even if you don’t do it out of suspicion, it can certainly be interpreted that way, by your boo especially.


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Of course, many excuses may come to mind to those defending the idea of answering their man or lady’s phone; “what’s mine is yours,” “if you have nothing to hide then why does it matter?” and so on. But the reality is that while it may seem “cute” to click that “answer” button, it proves nothing other than that you have attachment issues, trust issues or all of the above.


The only time answering your partner’s phone call is appropriate is when it’s a call he or she is expecting, such as from someone from work, a friend, family member, whoever. But unless and until you have that permission, then and only then do you proceed to answer.


Still, in the best interest of both people in the relationship it’s probably a better idea to stay out of each other’s call log. It eliminates the possibility of encountering any grey areas - because we all know how easily lines can be blurred. Besides, how annoying is it to call someone's phone only for their partner to answer instead?


Though you may feel as if you and your mate are one unit  and that nothing is off limits, you still want to keep boundaries as individuals and, importantly, as adults. No matter who’s paying the bill, your phone is your phone. Otherwise, why have separate numbers in the first place?


(Photo: GettyImages)

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