When Your Mate Asks 'Am I Fat?' Should You Be Honest?

Life & Love | Bené Viera | 04/01/2014 | 10:36 AM EDT

Tune in to 'According to Him & Her' on Friday, Apr. 4 at 9 p.m. EST

Honesty as the best policy in relationships is always touted as the holy grail. No one wants to be with a liar. But what about that dreaded moment when your mate asks, “Am I fat?”

In the upcoming episode of “According to Him & Her” the guests will hilariously address Rule 22: When your mate asks, “Am I fat?” always be honest.

Some partners feel there is no way to properly discuss weight matters with their mate because of the sensitivity of the topic. So even if they feel their significant other has put on a few pounds, they’ll remain mute because of all the emotions it could bring up.

One can be honest with their partner about weight without being insulting or making them feel you’re no longer attracted to them. For example, “Babe, let’s go to the gym together to get in shape” or “Babe, what do you think about eating healthier and exercising regularly?”

If your partner asks you a specific question about weight gain or their body you’re in the clear to be as honest as possible. However, honesty also requires sensitivity. Being direct shouldn’t translate to being rude or harsh.

Weight is a touchy subject for hundreds of thousands of Americans. It can particularly be a tough time for anyone who has packed on some extra pounds. Weight is directly related to self-esteem and how someone views their self-image. If your partner is vulnerable enough to ask your opinion about something so personal there’s no need to kick them when they’re down, but don’t lie.

Also, weight is a health issue. You have a right to want your mate to be the healthiest they can be. On a more vain level, and no one likes to say it, but if you met your mate at 145 pounds and in a year they’ve gone up to 180, your attraction is waning, sex has changed, then you have a right to address it with your partner respectfully.

The reality is that your partner hopefully loves you unconditionally, but if they didn’t sign up for a heavyset man or woman then it’s not wrong for them to say so.

“Am I fat?” is a loaded question and seemingly impossible to address. A touchy subject indeed, but it can be done with love and honesty.

(Photo: Mike Watson Images/Getty Images)

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