Should You Be Friends With Someone Your Spouse Doesn't Like?

Life & Love | Gerren Keith Gaynor | 03/25/2014 | 01:00 PM EDT

Phaedra Parks forbids husband Apollo Nida from speaking to arch nemesis Kenya Moore. Is it fair or wrong?

Unless you’ve been living under a reality television rock (or simply not a fan), you’d know the drama between Real Housewives of Atlanta co-stars Phaedra Parks and Kenya Moore. The feud between the two took a serious turn when Parks discovered “inappropriate” text messages between Moore and her husband, Apollo Nida.

On the current season, Apollo gets in hot water when he’s caught being chummy with Kenya after his wife instructed him not to speak to her, not just because of the beef they originally had over a business partnership gone awry, but also because Phaedra felt like Moore could not be trusted with her husband. But what surprised many viewers was that Apollo seemed to care more about letting bygones be bygones with Kenya than respecting the feelings of his wife.

It’s not unusual for a wife to ask her husband not to socialize with someone she doesn’t particularly care for, let alone another woman. But while stereotypically women exhibit “catty behavior” and follow a list of codes as it relates to other women and their men, males don’t always see the logic.

Some men would probably choose to not engage in the drama between women...but if a man’s wife or girlfriend has serious beef with another woman (or man for that matter), should he respect her wishes or should he be allowed to befriend whomever he pleases?

On one side of the argument is that what’s between you and another person should not affect your mate, for as adults we should be allowed to make our own decisions. However, on the flip side, others would argue that your loyalty should always be to your spouse and if someone disrespects or dislikes your wife or husband, they’re also disrespecting you.

Of course, Phaedra and Apollo’s situation is unique in that another women seemed to be coming on to her man. Once a woman has been declared a potential homewrecker or someone who's trying to flirt with someone else’s man, by most accounts she’s blacklisted for good - not to mention it doesn’t make it any better that Kenya is an attractive woman, who Apollo has repeatedly complimented and said he could sleep with if he wanted to.

With that kind of tangled web, it’s no wonder why Phaedra would be uncomfortable, even livid, that her husband was seen trying to be friends with Kenya. When it comes to relationships, it’s best to keep the harmony. If someone is on your mate’s list of enemies, it’d be wise to stay away.

Do you think people should be friends with someone their spouse doesn’t like?

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