Is It Ever OK to Get Back With Your Ex?

Life & Love | Gerren Keith Gaynor | 03/24/2014 | 10:30 AM EDT

They say people break up to make up, but is it a good idea?

Though the The Stylistics song famously goes “break up to make up that’s all we do,” many would argue that once a couple has decided to call it quits there’s no point of return. But is it entirely true?

In Hollywood we often see couples break up, but rarely do we see any of them rekindle their romance - though NeNe Leakes’ remarrying of her husband Greg Leakes gave many a glimpse of hope that love a second time around is possible.

Depending on what led to the breakup would more than likely determine whether it’s a good idea to get back together with your ex beau. If there was cheating or some form of disrespect involved, it’s probably not a wise choice. But if the breakup was more minor like a difference of opinion, lack of available time to cultivate the relationship and such, it wouldn’t hurt to see if you can get that old thing back.

When you have history with a person you already know what makes them’s familiar. That can be a great thing or it could be very problematic, however. As it relates to getting back with your ex, it’s not enough to simply follow your heart because you’re more than likely swayed or mystified by the “good ole days” when you and your ex were together. Sometimes people forget why they broke up in the first place, leaving them open to getting burned all over again.

Before you make that fateful decision be sure to communicate very clear to your ex, from your perspective, what went wrong in the relationship so that you can avoid making that same mistake. The benefit of having history is that you already have an idea of what to expect, good or bad, which gives you the advantage of maneuvering within the relationship without some of the hiccups you normally would encounter with someone new.

However, choosing to double dip in your dating life is a huge risk. You can end up in a destructive relationship where you and your mate push each other’s buttons because you have so much history. Before deciding to rekindle your relationship make sure the decision is because you truly feel in your heart that he or she is the one, not because you’re lonely or because it’s simply convenient because you’re both single. You don’t want to end up playing with each other’s emotions or destroying what little respect you may have for each other.

There’s no right or wrong answer when it comes to matters of the heart. Just be sure to play it smart.

Do you think it’s ever OK to get back with an ex? Sound off.

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